I trained with Evelyn Tribole, co-author of Intuitive Eating, to become a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor and she gave me a great tool to use with clients. It’s called the Power of 3. Whenever you have a negative thought about food or your body, write it down and come up with 3 alternative positive thoughts. Sounds easy, right? Well, not so easy at first. Most people have a difficult time coming up with three alternatives.
Why is it so hard?
Because automatic negative thoughts (lets think of them as pesky ants) have a way of infesting your thoughts and draws you back to them time and time again. And because their automatic, it’s hard to shut them up. But there is an “ant” killer that helps you create a new grove in your brain.
The almighty Lizzo once said, “I don’t think that loving yourself is a choice. I think that it’s a decision that has to be made for survival; it was in my case.” Let’s take the first step to deciding to love ourselves by learning how to overcome negative thoughts with the Power of 3:
Using the Power of 3
Let’s say your negative thought is, “I can’t wear a bathing suit because my body is too big.”
Power of 3 says, “think of 3 alternative positive thoughts”:
1. There is no wrong size body: bodies come in all shapes and sizes.
2. I don’t need to change my body to enjoy a season and go swimming.
3. Anyone who judges the way I look, is superficial and their opinion is not important to me.
Let’s say your negative thought is, “Eating fatty food is bad for me.”
Power of 3 says:
1. Fat makes food taste good and one of food’s functions is to taste yummy!
2. Fat in food keeps helps my brain function better.
3. When I restrict foods with fat, I wind up bingeing later.
You May Get Stuck on Finding 3 Positive Alternatives
You will likely get stuck if you’ve been telling yourself negative things about your body and food for a long time. Your subconscious will take a beat to get online with the new program. Be patient and don’t give up. It took a long time to learn all the dieting and body image ‘rules and regulations’ so it makes sense that the unlearning curve will be steep as well. If you stick with it, and challenge those pesky ants with three counter thoughts, your hard work will pay off. Over time the Power of 3 game gets easier and easier.
Two Stuckbusters
1. Ask yourself if the negative statement is 100% true, 100% of the time, and scale it. Often our negative thoughts feel 100% true in our heads, but when written down in the light of day, they lose their power. Let’s say you decide that your negative thought is 60% true, ask yourself why not 100%, and that’s where you will find your counter thoughts: in the 40% that’s not true. This scaling tool helps combat the distorted “all or nothing” thinking that all of us do .
2. Pretend you’re talking to a friend. What would you say to a friend who was berating their body or food choices. Often we find that we would never talk to a friend the way we speak to ourselves. This is important because the longest relationship you’re ever going to have is with yourself! So developing more self-compassion is fundamental to living your best life.